They Will Kill You (R)
Cast: Zazie Beetz, Myha'la Herrold, Tom Felton, Heather Graham
Release Date: March 27, 2026
Runtime: 1 hr. 35 mins.
Genre: Action/Adventure, Comedy
THEY WILL KILL YOU unleashes a blood-soaked, high-octane horror-action-comedy in which a young woman must survive the night at the Virgil, a demonic cult’s mysterious and twisted death-trap of a lair, before becoming their next offering in a uniquely brazen, big screen battle of epic kills and wickedly dark humor.
Review
You know what they say about "too much of a good thing?" That applies to They Will Kill You, the English-language debut of Russian filmmaker Kirill Sokolov, whose hyperkinetic approach to killing Satanic cultists is initially funny, bracing, and thoroughly entertaining... until it becomes repetitive and even a little tedious. At half its length, They Will Kill You would have gotten an unquestioned thumbs up from me, but the movie started to lose my attention during the second half, mainly because Sokolov didn't offer anything beyond what's available during the film's early scenes. The 94-minute runtime begins to feel bloated as the narrative loops back on itself without introducing new stakes.
The DNA of Sokolov's inspirations are writ large in what's on-screen. He has clearly been influenced by Quentin Tarantino (right down to the "feet shots") and Sam Raimi. His approach to both narrative and tone are highly reminiscent of the former in particular. His tongue-in-cheek horror methodology nods to the latter, especially Evil Dead 2 and Army of Darkness. He pays homage to the great Tom Savini, with fountains of blood and practical special effects galore. Isaac Bauman's cinematography enhances the chaos, utilizing whip-pans and Dutch angles to maintain a dizzying energy. Although there may be some CGI in there somewhere, this movie mostly looks like an '80s relic. The over-the-top gore is intentionally campy, designed more for laughs than scares. The fight scenes, of which there are a great many, are focused more on spilled viscera and exploding heads than advancing the thin narrative. And if the film seems oddly reminiscent of Ready or Not and its recent sequel, Here I Come, that's probably coincidental. (Although it's questionable whether the market can tolerate two such similar premises at the same time.)
Asia Reaves (Zazie Beetz) is looking for her sister, Maria (Myha'la), who has been kidnapped by a group of Satanic cultists led by the austere Lily Woodhouse (Patricia Arquette). Her pursuit takes her into the depths of the hotel that doubles as the cultists' hideout, a labyrinthine setting that provides ample corridors for mayhem. When she realizes she is an intended sacrifice, she finds a blade and starts hacking. Unfortunately, although the cultists may not be the most adept killers, they are immortal due to a ritualistic pact, so killing them once isn't enough. Nor twice. They just keep coming back, and there are a lot of them.
For Zazie Beetz, this is an opportunity to kill without compunction. The physicality demanded by the role is impressive. Sokolov treats her much as Tarantino did Uma Thurman's Bride in Kill Bill - she's a kick-ass force of nature who always gives more than she absorbs. The stunts are similar, the gore is on the same level, and the feet are bare. Heather Graham is somewhat underutilized and Patricia Arquette seems to have forgotten to shed her Severance personality, bringing an icy, corporate detachment to her role as a cult leader.
Ultimately, They Will Kill You feels like nothing more than a 90-minute "sizzle reel." Backstory is minimal, character development is perfunctory, and narrative thrust is just a way to keep the killings coming. This is essentially just a feature-length chronicle of chases, eviscerations, decapitations, sword fights, gun fights, and various similar things. It's a little surprising to see something this experimental be accorded a wide theatrical release but horror is popular enough that even a niche production like this might find an audience. This has "future cult film" written all over it. But, for those who are more concerned about the here and now, this is a film that delivers on its own peculiar brand of delights before wearing out its welcome.
© 2026 James Berardinelli
Synopsis
THEY WILL KILL YOU unleashes a blood-soaked, high-octane horror-action-comedy in which a young woman must survive the night at the Virgil, a demonic cult’s mysterious and twisted death-trap of a lair, before becoming their next offering in a uniquely brazen, big screen battle of epic kills and wickedly dark humor.